This has to be a new low in corporate spin, even for Telstra.  Apparently if genuine competition is allowed in the Australian broadband market, we will be more vulnerable to terrorist attacks.

Conveniently this directly links Telstra’s near-monopoly position and commercial success with the safety of Australians who (rightly or wrongly) are genuinely afraid of terrorism. 

Obviously the only solution to protect us adequately will be to ban other telcos from competing in Telstra’s heavily defended, bomb-proof market space.

After making these public service announcements, Telstra then went on to confirm its patriotic status by adding an additional threat to invest its money in a more grateful foreign nation if it didn’t get its way in Australia:

“We can do other things in this country, or we can do other things outside this country.”

The threat to invest offshore rather than in Australia was first made in May by Telstra chief operating officer Greg Winn, but he later recanted, claiming to have been misquoted.

Pictured: The Telstra Omni-watch Anti-Al Qaeda Tower protects the nation from rampaging Arabiacs